Pure stupidity

Well, I have screwed myself once again. I had every intention of doing really good this week and instead I gained almost 3 pounds. I am pretty mad at myself, but the way I ate this week, I should have expected it. I ate fast food almost everyday, I am back to drinking Pepsi again, and not working out as much. I can't figure out what my problem is, why I'm sabotaging myself. There is no good reason for me doing what I'm doing. Hawaii is a week away, and I'm 22 pounds away from my original Hawaii goal. Now my goal at this point is to just not gain anymore! This is ridiculous! Somehow I need to find my motivation, otherwise I'm gonna gain back everything I've worked so hard at to lose.

8-6-11 (197) (+2.7) (Total loss 15.3) (-7.2%) (BMI: 30)
7-30-11 (194.3) (-3) (Total loss 18) (-8.5%) (BMI: 29.5)
7-23-11 (197.3) (+4.3) (Total loss 15) (-7.1%) (BMI: 30)
7-16-11 (193) (-1.3) (Total loss 19.3) (-9.1%) (BMI: 29.3)
7-9-11 (194.3) (-.3) (Total loss 18) (-8.5%) (BMI: 29.5)
7-2-11 (194.6) (-3.8) (Total loss 17.7) (-8.3%) (BMI: 29.6)
6-25-11 (198.4) (-.2) (Total loss 13.9) (-6.5%) (BMI: 30.2)
6-18-11 (198.6) (-1.9) (Total loss 13.7) (-6.5%) (BMI: 30.2)
6-11-11 (200.5) (+1.1) (Total loss 11.8) (-5.6%) (BMI: 30.5)
6-4-11 (199.4) (-3.3) (Total loss 12.9) (-6.1%) (BMI: 30.3)
5-28-11 (202.7) (+.1) Total loss 9.6) (-4.5%) (BMI: 30.8)
5-21-11 (202.6) (+.8) (Total loss 9.7) (-4.6%) (BMI: 30.8)
5-14-11 (201.8) (-4.2) (Total loss 10.5) (-4.9%) (BMI: 30.7)
5-7-11 (206)(-.9) (Total loss 6.3) (-3%) (BMI: 31.1)
4-30-11 (206.9) (+1.2) (Total loss 5.4) (-2.5%) (BMI: 31.5)
4-23-11 (205.7) (+.2) (Total loss 6.6) (-3.1%) (BMI: 31.3)
4-16-11 (205.5) (-2.8) (Total loss 6.8) (-3.2%) (BMI: 31.2)
4-9-11 (208.3) (-1.4) (Total loss 4) (-1.9%) (BMI: 31.7)
4-2-11 (209.7) (+2.9) (Total loss 2.6) (-1.2%) (BMI: 31.9)
3-26-11 (206.8) (-2) (Total loss 5.5) (-2.6%) (BMI: 31.4)
3-19-11 (208.8) (+2.6) (Total loss 3.5) (-1.6%) (BMI: 31.7)
3-12-11 (206.2) (+2.3) (Total loss 6.1) (-2.9%) (BMI: 31.3)
3-5-11 (203.9) (-8.4) (Total loss 8.4) (-4%) (BMI: 31)
2-17-11 (212.3) (BMI: 32.3) (Highest in 2011, STARTING OVER)

Moving slow...

Well, the last couple weeks have been really hard. A combination of stress & loss of motivation has really taken a toll on my body. We are trying to buy a house and it's not going well, due to the bank being a pain, along with the seller's realtor. So I've been eating really bad and not sleeping much at night, which has been hurting me too. Last week I showed a 4.3 gain from the previous week. That was SUPER frustrating. I also stopped getting on the scale, because I was told it might help. Well, for me, it doesn't help not seeing it everyday. So I started getting on the scale again, and I lost 3 pounds this week. I'm still up 1.3 from my lowest, but that's OK. I'll get there sooner or later. I am frustrated, however, that we are leaving for Hawaii in 2 weeks and I'm nowhere near where I wanted to be. So, I'm sorry to the people in Hawaii, they're just gonna have to see this body a little fluffier than planned! So, I just keep on trying.

I did miss 5 days of working out this week, but got back on it today. I did try running one day last week too. I went to the middle school track and decided to alternate. I started off walking the first lap, ran a lap, walked a lap, etc until I had completed 2 miles. I'm going to start the Couch 2 5K program when we get back from Hawaii. I'm determined to run a race within the next year!

Let's hope I can lose at least 6 more pounds before Hawaii. At least that'll get me in the 180's and I'll hit my 10% goal! My goal this week is to lose 3.3 pounds, because that'll be my 10%. Wish me luck!

7-30-11 (194.3) (-3) (Total loss 18) (-8.5%) (BMI: 29.5)
7-23-11 (197.3) (+4.3) (Total loss 15) (-7.1%) (BMI: 30)
7-16-11 (193) (-1.3) (Total loss 19.3) (-9.1%) (BMI: 29.3)
7-9-11 (194.3) (-.3) (Total loss 18) (-8.5%) (BMI: 29.5)
7-2-11 (194.6) (-3.8) (Total loss 17.7) (-8.3%) (BMI: 29.6)
6-25-11 (198.4) (-.2) (Total loss 13.9) (-6.5%) (BMI: 30.2)
6-18-11 (198.6) (-1.9) (Total loss 13.7) (-6.5%) (BMI: 30.2)
6-11-11 (200.5) (+1.1) (Total loss 11.8) (-5.6%) (BMI: 30.5)
6-4-11 (199.4) (-3.3) (Total loss 12.9) (-6.1%) (BMI: 30.3)
5-28-11 (202.7) (+.1) Total loss 9.6) (-4.5%) (BMI: 30.8)
5-21-11 (202.6) (+.8) (Total loss 9.7) (-4.6%) (BMI: 30.8)
5-14-11 (201.8) (-4.2) (Total loss 10.5) (-4.9%) (BMI: 30.7)
5-7-11 (206)(-.9) (Total loss 6.3) (-3%) (BMI: 31.1)
4-30-11 (206.9) (+1.2) (Total loss 5.4) (-2.5%) (BMI: 31.5)
4-23-11 (205.7) (+.2) (Total loss 6.6) (-3.1%) (BMI: 31.3)
4-16-11 (205.5) (-2.8) (Total loss 6.8) (-3.2%) (BMI: 31.2)
4-9-11 (208.3) (-1.4) (Total loss 4) (-1.9%) (BMI: 31.7)
4-2-11 (209.7) (+2.9) (Total loss 2.6) (-1.2%) (BMI: 31.9)
3-26-11 (206.8) (-2) (Total loss 5.5) (-2.6%) (BMI: 31.4)
3-19-11 (208.8) (+2.6) (Total loss 3.5) (-1.6%) (BMI: 31.7)
3-12-11 (206.2) (+2.3) (Total loss 6.1) (-2.9%) (BMI: 31.3)
3-5-11 (203.9) (-8.4) (Total loss 8.4) (-4%) (BMI: 31)
2-17-11 (212.3) (BMI: 32.3) (Highest in 2011, STARTING OVER)

Overweight!!! No longer obese!

Well, I was so swept up in my scale number, that I never thought to check my BMI. I am no longer in the obese category!!! I am officially in the overweight category! It's been a long time, so I'm really excited about that. I was pretty upset this morning when I got on the scale & found I only had a .3 loss. I have worked really hard this week on my eating, even being good over 4th of July. I'm finally walking outside in the evenings, on top of my morning workouts. I'm not sure why my weight isn't moving, but I guess I should be happy with the BMI. My jeans are a hair looser too. Not much, but a little. Guess I'll keep trying this week & see what happens.

7-9-11 (194.3) (-.3) (Total loss 18) (-8.5%) (BMI: 29.5)
7-2-11 (194.6) (-3.8) (Total loss 17.7) (-8.3%) (BMI: 29.6)
6-25-11 (198.4) (-.2) (Total loss 13.9) (-6.5%) (BMI: 30.2)
6-18-11 (198.6) (-1.9) (Total loss 13.7) (-6.5%) (BMI: 30.2)
6-11-11 (200.5) (+1.1) (Total loss 11.8) (-5.6%) (BMI: 30.5)
6-4-11 (199.4) (-3.3) (Total loss 12.9) (-6.1%) (BMI: 30.3)
5-28-11 (202.7) (+.1) Total loss 9.6) (-4.5%) (BMI: 30.8)
5-21-11 (202.6) (+.8) (Total loss 9.7) (-4.6%) (BMI: 30.8)
5-14-11 (201.8) (-4.2) (Total loss 10.5) (-4.9%) (BMI: 30.7)
5-7-11 (206)(-.9) (Total loss 6.3) (-3%) (BMI: 31.1)
4-30-11 (206.9) (+1.2) (Total loss 5.4) (-2.5%) (BMI: 31.5)
4-23-11 (205.7) (+.2) (Total loss 6.6) (-3.1%) (BMI: 31.3)
4-16-11 (205.5) (-2.8) (Total loss 6.8) (-3.2%) (BMI: 31.2)
4-9-11 (208.3) (-1.4) (Total loss 4) (-1.9%) (BMI: 31.7)
4-2-11 (209.7) (+2.9) (Total loss 2.6) (-1.2%) (BMI: 31.9)
3-26-11 (206.8) (-2) (Total loss 5.5) (-2.6%) (BMI: 31.4)
3-19-11 (208.8) (+2.6) (Total loss 3.5) (-1.6%) (BMI: 31.7)
3-12-11 (206.2) (+2.3) (Total loss 6.1) (-2.9%) (BMI: 31.3)
3-5-11 (203.9) (-8.4) (Total loss 8.4) (-4%) (BMI: 31)
2-17-11 (212.3) (BMI: 32.3) (Highest in 2011, STARTING OVER)

New goal!

OK, the day has come. I have a MAJOR goal to meet. We got the dates for Hawaii! We are leaving August 14th. That would be 15 weeks from tomorrow. I want to lose at least 41.9 more pounds, which would put me at 165. That's about 2.7 pounds per week. I'm sure I can do it if I really focus. So after this week-end, I REALLY have to focus! Gabe's birthday party is today, a sleep-over, so I plan on eating a little bad, but not horrible. I've had a problem with some dental work gone bad this week, so I couldn't work out today, but I plan on getting back into it tomorrow. I worked out 45 days in a row up until today, so let's see how I do starting tomorrow.

4-30-11 (206.9) (+1.2) (Total loss 5.4) (-2.5%) (BMI: 31.5)
4-23-11 (205.7) (+.2) (Total loss 6.6) (-3.1%) (BMI: 31.3)
4-16-11 (205.5) (-2.8) (Total loss 6.8) (-3.2%) (BMI: 31.2)
4-9-11 (208.3) (-1.4) (Total loss 4) (-1.9%) (BMI: 31.7)
4-2-11 (209.7) (+2.9) (Total loss 2.6) (-1.2%) (BMI: 31.9)
3-26-11 (206.8) (-2) (Total loss 5.5) (-2.6%) (BMI: 31.4)
3-19-11 (208.8) (+2.6) (Total loss 3.5) (-1.6%) (BMI: 31.7)
3-12-11 (206.2) (+2.3) (Total loss 6.1) (-2.9%) (BMI: 31.3)
3-5-11 (203.9) (-8.4) (Total loss 8.4) (-4%) (BMI: 31)
2-17-11 (212.3) (BMI: 32.3) (Highest in 2011, STARTING OVER)

11-4-10 (209.8) (+2.1) (Total loss 2.8) (-1.3%) (BMI: 31.9)
11-1-10 (207.7) (+.7) (Total loss 4.9) (-2.3%) (BMI: 31.6)
10-1-10 (207) (-.3) (Total loss 5.6) (-2.6%) (BMI: 31.5)
9-2-10 (207.3) (+6) (Total loss 5.3) (-2.5%) (BMI: 31.5)
8-1-10 (201.3) (-4.1) (Total loss 11.3) (-5.3%) (BMI: 30.6)
7-2-10 (205.4) (+.8) (Total loss 7.2) (-3.4%) (BMI: 31.2)
6-3-10 (204.6) (+5.3) (Total loss 8) (-3.8%) (BMI: 31.1)
5-1-10 (199.3) (+7.6) (Total loss 13.3) (-6.3%) (BMI: 30.3)
4-1-10 (191.7) (+2.6) (Total loss 20.9) (-9.8%) (BMI: 29.1)
3-1-10 (189.1) (+3.9) (Total loss 23.5) (-11.1%) (BMI: 28.7)
2-7-10 (185.2) (-1.6) (Total loss 27.4) (-12.9%) (BMI: 28.2) (Week 1)
1-31-10 (186.8) (-.5) (Total loss 25.8) (-12.1%) (BMI: 28.4) (New start)
1-1-10 (187.3) (+1.1) (Total loss 25.3) (-11.9%) (BMI: 28.5)
12-1-09 (186.2) (-1) (Total loss 26.4) (-12.4%) (BMI: 28.3)
11-1-09 (187.2) (+15.3) (Total loss 25.4) (-11.9%) (BMI: 28.5) (Starting over)

3-11-09 (164.4) (-7.5) (Total loss 48.2) (-22.7%) (BMI: 25) (Week 31-lowest)
2-5-09 (171.9) (+5.6) (Total loss 40.7) (-19.1%) (BMI: 26.1) (Week 26)
1-1-09 (173) (-.7) (Total loss 39.6) (-18.6%) (BMI: 26.3) (Week 21)
12-4-08 (172.1) (-0) (Total loss 40.5) (-19%) (BMI: 26.2) (Week 17)
11-7-08 (176.8) (+1.2) (Total loss 35.8) (-16.8%) (BMI: 26.9) (Week 13)
10-3-08 (185) (-2.7) (Total loss 27.6) (-13%) (BMI: 28.1) (Week 8)
9-5-08 (195.7) (-1.3) (Total loss 16.9) (-7.9%) (BMI: 29.8) (Week 4)
8-5-08 (212.6) (Start) (BMI: 32.3)

Will I ever get skinny again???

OK, so here I sit again, completely frustrated. I set a goal for myself, again. Once again, I don't meet it. This is becoming a bad habit & it's really starting to affect me negatively. The AdvoCare didn't work for me, because I can't take vitamins in the morning. They wreak havoc on my stomach, so I have to take them at night. Well, with the 24 Day Challenge, you have to take them certain times of the day. So I couldn't finish the challenge. So I decided to do it my own way. Well, for some stupid reason, I can't seem to focus. I did set up a goal for working out however. I never made it to 100 days in a row of working out before because I got sick. So I set that goal once again for myself. Today was day 18. I'm doing great with the workouts. I have been looking forward to them everyday, except today. I got on the scale & it just hurts to see it move up, not down. I've never cried while working out, but it happened today. The first half mile, that's all I could do. But I pushed myself & made it 4 miles. I still don't feel much better, but at least I did it. I just can't seem to get the eating part down. I think the thing that is so frustrating to me, is that I know how to do it, I just can't tell my brain to do it. So I'm eating the same as always, crappy, but working out, and the scale is still going up. Not sure how to fix my brain.

And then there's the BMI thing. I am considered obese according to the body mass index chart. I have to lose 13.2 pounds to just be considered overweight. Who decides this thing? I wouldn't consider myself obese, but when it tells me that, that's frustrating too. So, what do I do? I'm not sure. When I figure that out, I'll let ya know!

4-2-11 (209.7) (+2.9) (Total loss 2.6) (-1.2%) (BMI: 31.9)
3-26-11 (206.8) (-2) (Total loss 5.5) (-2.6%) (BMI: 31.4)
3-19-11 (208.8) (+2.6) (Total loss 3.5) (-1.6%) (BMI: 31.7)
3-12-11 (206.2) (+2.3) (Total loss 6.1) (-2.9%) (BMI: 31.3)
3-5-11 (203.9) (-8.4) (Total loss 8.4) (-4%) (BMI: 31)
2-17-11 (212.3) (BMI: 32.3) (Highest in 2011, STARTING OVER)

11-4-10 (209.8) (+2.1) (Total loss 2.8) (-1.3%) (BMI: 31.9)
11-1-10 (207.7) (+.7) (Total loss 4.9) (-2.3%) (BMI: 31.6)
10-1-10 (207) (-.3) (Total loss 5.6) (-2.6%) (BMI: 31.5)
9-2-10 (207.3) (+6) (Total loss 5.3) (-2.5%) (BMI: 31.5)
8-1-10 (201.3) (-4.1) (Total loss 11.3) (-5.3%) (BMI: 30.6)
7-2-10 (205.4) (+.8) (Total loss 7.2) (-3.4%) (BMI: 31.2)
6-3-10 (204.6) (+5.3) (Total loss 8) (-3.8%) (BMI: 31.1)
5-1-10 (199.3) (+7.6) (Total loss 13.3) (-6.3%) (BMI: 30.3)
4-1-10 (191.7) (+2.6) (Total loss 20.9) (-9.8%) (BMI: 29.1)
3-1-10 (189.1) (+3.9) (Total loss 23.5) (-11.1%) (BMI: 28.7)
2-7-10 (185.2) (-1.6) (Total loss 27.4) (-12.9%) (BMI: 28.2) (Week 1)
1-31-10 (186.8) (-.5) (Total loss 25.8) (-12.1%) (BMI: 28.4) (New start)
1-1-10 (187.3) (+1.1) (Total loss 25.3) (-11.9%) (BMI: 28.5)
12-1-09 (186.2) (-1) (Total loss 26.4) (-12.4%) (BMI: 28.3)
11-1-09 (187.2) (+15.3) (Total loss 25.4) (-11.9%) (BMI: 28.5) (Starting over)

3-11-09 (164.4) (-7.5) (Total loss 48.2) (-22.7%) (BMI: 25) (Week 31-lowest)
2-5-09 (171.9) (+5.6) (Total loss 40.7) (-19.1%) (BMI: 26.1) (Week 26)
1-1-09 (173) (-.7) (Total loss 39.6) (-18.6%) (BMI: 26.3) (Week 21)
12-4-08 (172.1) (-0) (Total loss 40.5) (-19%) (BMI: 26.2) (Week 17)
11-7-08 (176.8) (+1.2) (Total loss 35.8) (-16.8%) (BMI: 26.9) (Week 13)
10-3-08 (185) (-2.7) (Total loss 27.6) (-13%) (BMI: 28.1) (Week 8)
9-5-08 (195.7) (-1.3) (Total loss 16.9) (-7.9%) (BMI: 29.8) (Week 4)
8-5-08 (212.6) (Start) (BMI: 32.3)

24 Day Challenge - Day 1

Well, today is the day I started the AdvoCare 24 day challenge. I was totally gung ho on getting up & measuring, weighing, taking before pictures, etc. I went to drink the fiber drink & learned one very important thing: do not let it sit for any time at all because it thickens up & is very hard to swallow it without gagging it back up. Soooo, lesson learned. Other than that, I'm doing pretty good with it. I did realize however, that we have a lot of junk food in this house! Getting the kids breakfast this morning was an eye opener. I realized how much stuff I need to get rid of to make our family healthy! So I went to the store & loaded up on fruits & veggies. And some soy milk. I'm thinking I'll make a smoothie with that & some berries. We'll see how it tastes! This is a whole new thing for me, because I've never done a cleanse and I've never been on any different eating habits (I don't want to say the "D" word - diet, cause I don't believe in diets. I believe in lifestyle changes). I hate counting calories, so I'm really excited that I don't have to with AdvoCare's challenge. I will be updating along the way, so check back regularly!

2-18-11 (210.8) (BMI: 32) (Day 1 of AdvoCare 24 Day Challenge)

11-29-10 (212.1) (BMI: 32.2) (Highest in 2010)

11-4-10 (209.8) (+2.1) (Total loss -2.8) (-1.3%) (BMI: 31.9)
11-1-10 (207.7) (+.7) (Total loss -4.9) (-2.3%) (BMI: 31.6)
10-1-10 (207) (-.3) (Total loss -5.6) (-2.6%) (BMI: 31.5)
9-2-10 (207.3) (+6) (Total loss -5.3) (-2.5%) (BMI: 31.5)
8-1-10 (201.3) (-4.1) (Total loss -11.3) (-5.3%) (BMI: 30.6)
7-2-10 (205.4) (+.8) (Total loss -7.2) (-3.4%) (BMI: 31.2)
6-3-10 (204.6) (+5.3) (Total loss -8) (-3.8%) (BMI: 31.1)
5-1-10 (199.3) (+7.6) (Total loss -13.3) (-6.3%) (BMI: 30.3)
4-1-10 (191.7) (+2.6) (Total loss -20.9) (-9.8%) (BMI: 29.1)
3-1-10 (189.1) (+3.9) (Total loss -23.5) (-11.1%) (BMI: 28.7)
2-7-10 (185.2) (-1.6) (Total loss -27.4) (-12.9%) (BMI: 28.2) (Week 1)
1-31-10 (186.8) (-.5) (Total loss -25.8) (-12.1%) (BMI: 28.4) (New start)
1-1-10 (187.3) (+1.1) (Total loss -25.3) (-11.9%) (BMI: 28.5)
12-1-09 (186.2) (-1) (Total loss -26.4) (-12.4%) (BMI: 28.3)
11-1-09 (187.2) (+15.3) (Total loss -25.4) (-11.9%) (BMI: 28.5) (Starting over)

3-11-09 (164.4) (-7.5) (Total loss -48.2) (-22.7%) (BMI: 25) (Week 31-lowest)
2-5-09 (171.9) (+5.6) (Total loss -40.7) (-19.1%) (BMI: 26.1) (Week 26)
1-1-09 (173) (-.7) (Total loss -39.6) (-18.6%) (BMI: 26.3) (Week 21)
12-4-08 (172.1) (-0) (Total loss -40.5) (-19%) (BMI: 26.2) (Week 17)
11-7-08 (176.8) (+1.2) (Total loss -35.8) (-16.8%) (BMI: 26.9) (Week 13)
10-3-08 (185) (-2.7) (Total loss -27.6) (-13%) (BMI: 28.1) (Week 8)
9-5-08 (195.7) (-1.3) (Total loss -16.9) (-7.9%) (BMI: 29.8) (Week 4)
8-5-08 (212.6) (Start) (BMI: 32.3)